Liam's Story: From The Outside

I’m not the usual candidate for writing a blog for Unreal’s website. Most of the blogs will, quite rightly, be from those with lived experience of DPRD. There may be some written by those whose loved ones are experiencing symptoms. There may be others from clinicians with medical expertise on the subject.

I am none of these - in many ways a complete outsider to the community. Two and a half years ago I had never heard of DPRD. That all changed when I received an email from the Chair of Unreal looking for an accountant to join the charity as a Trustee to help on the finance side and other corporate issues. In essence, the boring stuff – my area of expertise!

The first thing I had to do though was to google Depersonalisation and Derealisation Disorder. Reading articles online I was quickly surprised this had had to be the case - as the symptoms are not uncommon and there is obviously a large population dealing with them. I like to think I am quite aware of what goes on in the world, so how could I have never heard of this?

Somewhere, I saw a description that it was a bit like an out-of-body experience. Another website explained it was like seeing the world through a pane of glass. These are the descriptions I try to use when people ask me about what Unreal does. Most people nod politely; and some talk about the feeling after taking painkillers or recreational drugs as being a bit like that. I think I usually nod along enthusiastically but, truthfully, I have no clue if that really is right.

Art is one thing that has really helped me to get some understanding of what the symptoms are like to experience. In particular, Jodie Howard’s amazing Unrealities illustration series helped me to see, just for a moment, that feeling of being separate from the world. DPRD seems to be something that’s so hard to comprehend unless you can see the world through that lens.

In no way am I likening this to those going through the experience in their own lives. But during my time as a member of Unreal’s board, the biggest barrier I have found in raising awareness of DPRD is making it ‘feel real’ to those you are explaining it to. It’s hard to get people to buy in to anything that doesn’t feel like part of their world!

Thankfully, mental health issues are now accepted as part of day-to-day life. People better understand what anxiety is and how they might support those suffering from it, for example. Everyone has felt down about something at some point, and a growing number of people living with depression are being given the support they need.

There is no reason DPRD should not be part of society’s consciousness in the same way - and for those experiencing symptoms to get the support they need. It’s one of the main reasons Unreal exists and we are passionate about raising awareness to get this same recognition for DPRD. I have so much respect and empathy for those living with these experiences and having to function in a world that largely doesn’t understand them. Hopefully the journey society has taken in accepting other mental health conditions can be repeated for DPRD.

From the outside, DPRD still remains much of a mystery. Its not easy to explain and can feel a bit abstract. Personally though, I am so glad I do now know about DPRD. It’s opened my eyes to a different perspective. I’ve also met some wonderful, smart, committed people who are really dedicated to trying to make a difference for those living this experience. And I firmly believe Unreal can make this difference.